Tuesday, 15 October 2013

Week in pictures

Week or two in pictures. 

I turned an ' I don't want to walk' tantrum into a photo opportunity.

The cheesiest of grins ! 

Mid flight.....

Little charmer.....

My two little ones, the best photo I have been able to get of them both together for ages....needs work. 

Sunday, 13 October 2013

Times are a changin'

I have been wanting to write a post about my Little Tyke for a while now. She is just wonderful, and I could write about her all day, her little oddities, cute-ities, and lovely-ities.

She is mostly, (she has her off days, don't we all ?!) great company. I'm not sure if that shows how interesting she is, or how bad my social life has become, but either way. She is at the age where everything is a question, and enquiry or a request. She has even started telling jokes. 
Now, for any other parents with a child over the age of three, this isn't news to you. But it's new for me, my first baby is now three, yes THREE. 
This is her at her birthday party, making a play dough sculpture of some description.

Tomorrow she takes her first trip out of our safe, fluffy nest, into the big wide world of pre school. 
I am trying not to make it into a huge drama, projecting some angst I have about her growing up onto her, isn't gonna help anyone. So tomorrow morning will be as low key affair as I can make it. 
When I come home from dropping her off, I will be trying my best not to lament the passing of one phase, instead being excited for new times ahead.  ( time will tell if I achieve this goal  )
As I write this down, it sounds entirely ridiculous but since she was about 5 months old I have worried about how I would get her to nursery when she started. Not being able to walk far, and not having access to a car during the day, kind of makes this new phase a tricky one. But true to form, various people and situations have come together to mean it will be just fine. 

I wanted this post to be more poetically written. A lovely reflection of my girl, but I'm a bit fuzzy headed today, you can't win them all ey.

Tomorrow is the start of a new phase for my Little Tyke and I, hoping, really hoping it will be an enjoyable one.

Wednesday, 2 October 2013

Church ramblings

I have been thinking a lot about Church recently, what it is, what I think about it, and what God thinks about it. I have always been a 'churchy' kind of girl, always loved going, and kind of felt at ease there. I know this is far from many people's experiences, but right now I can only really write from my own.

I have sat myself in a variety of pews, chairs, cushions on the floor, and stools. All in different 'types' of churches. Pentecostal, Baptist, Anglican, Evangelical, Methodist, Assemblies of God, Pioneer, New Fronteers, House Churches, 'We haven't quite defined ourselves yet' Churches, and all the other types in between.

I have found God in all of them, I have also found heartbreak and sin in all of them too. Cos Churches are full of people, and where people are, there is always mess.

People are messy.

But I still believe that Church is what God wants me to be part of.

Before I had CFS, being 'in' a church was mostly what I 'did'. I worked there, worshiped there, played there, and while I spent time at university too, I guess my whole time schedule revolved around 'Church'. I don't regret this, and felt at the time it was the thing I wanted to do. That was ok. But gradually having CFS has made it really hard for me to be part of the church I loved. It was too energetic, too many people all at once, too big a commitment. I found I didn't really have a place in some parts of it as I was so very unreliable. It wasn't any one's fault, just circumstances. It has taken me years to get my head around this, I kind of felt like my right arm had been chopped off. Those years were tough, really tough.

So I have had to take a step back, from 'doing' things in church, and just work out what are the most important things, for me.
Then, in time I use my small bits of energy on those.
And with the arrival of children, they have changed again too.

Conferences, I can't really 'do' conferences, they are big, and loud and exhausting, they take huge amounts of energy, emotional and spiritual. I do like christian conferences, but I also think that maybe, just maybe we all spent too much time preparing them, making them look flashy and appealing, advertising them, then being at them. When really, our energy could be spent elsewhere.
That's what I have discovered anyway.
They often seem to be filled with communicating the latest 'trend' in churches, I don't have time or energy for churchy trends.
Just keeping it plain and simple is where I am at right now.

I also like biscuits, cheap custard creams dunked in a cup of well brewed tea, this stands me in good stead to enjoying most churchy gatherings :)

In the past year we have moved to a different church, and it has been a bit like buying a new pair of Jeans. My previous Jeans were wonderful, initially fit me really well, but over time my body shape changed, and I needed a new pair, My old Jeans will always be my favourite I think, but the new Jeans enhance my shape better, and match better with the rest of my wardrobe.

................................... There is more to this post, but I have been writing it for a few weeks, so in order to ever post it, it needs to come in segments.....right now I am watching cbeebies and playing a game with my daughter - not the most conducive environment for clear writing ey !!